"BooThang"

"We just kickin it!" "We chillin!" "That's my BooThang!".......Now how many of you have heard these lines before? Hold up, hold up...what about this one..."We don't need/have a title bc titles just confuse things!" I know y'all have heard that one before! Now...I know I might catch some slack for this blog bc of all the ppl that use these phrases as their cop out, but hey I always welcome the debate! With that being said...is it just me or am I the only one that believes that titles don't "confuse," things, if anything they help to "DEFINE" things!!!

Okay follow me on this ppl...the issue I am addressing in this blog is not with the ppl that just met somebody and they have been dating for a few weeks or the "cut buddies." I am more so addressing the ppl who have been dealing with each other for months or even years, but they still can't seem to figure out what they are "doing" with that person. Look if you are perfectly fine with the ambiguity of the phrases I used to start this blog then hey if you like it, I love it! The only problem I see with this issue though is that ppl only seem to use these phrases when it's convenient for them. Let me explain:...

How come for most ppl y'all only "BooThangs" until the other person wants to see someone else? How come y'all just "kickin it" until he or she don't answer your calls and text messages for a few days? How come y'all "just chillin" until they make somebody else a priority before you or they don't have the time to "chill" with you? Do y'all see where I'm going with this? You see the problem is that most ppl that are doing these things either really believe they can handle it this way; are avoiding committing bc they still want to leave their options open for when it's convenient for them (ie: when they meet someone else); or are afraid to ask for a commitment bc of the fear of scaring the other person away (they would rather have something then nothing).

Look the bottom line is: there comes a certain time in in adulthood where being a "BooThang" is more of a liability than an asset. Most ppl desire true companionship, but many ppl don't want to sacrifice their own selfishness in order to get it. What ppl must understand is that when a person is "all in," and when they are truly in love with you they will naturally become very selfish. Not necessarily in a crazy/stalker way, but in a way that says I want your time, your love, your trust, your companionship MORE than I want the POTENTIAL to find it somewhere else! In other words they will COMMIT to you!!! When it's special and it's real you will move from "BooThang" to "MyThang" bc now the open door that is associated with just being a "BooThang" is no longer worth it and they will close it!

So what's my point? My point is that many of you are settling for being a "BooThang" and investing your time, effort, and emotional energy into something that you can't define now, and probably won't be able to define in the future. If you think that you can accept that role and eventually it will just happen then you need to wake up! If a person has no fear of losing you bc you accept the role of being a "BooThang" then you better believe you will remain just that; that's until they find someone else that they can't risk losing, and who won't accept it.

Look ppl I'm not saying that if you are in a situation to run around giving ultimatums or anything like that. What I am saying is that sometimes we get so comfortable with a situation that we never step back and reevaluate them. Sometimes we are so scared of losing something that we accept it even if we know it's ultimately not what we really want. All I'm saying is why settle for being a "BooThang" when you can be a "MyThang." Remember titles don't CONFUSE things, titles DEFINE things and I would argue that the title of "BooThang" is probably one that is probably not desired, rather it's one that is accepted!

Thanks for reading folks!! If you have an opinion about my opinion please comment!!